Thursday, January 5, 2012

A Very Irrelevant Post.

I love reading lists people compile of random shit that intrigue, bother, inspire them which in turn intrigue, bother, and inspire me. I've been working on such a list - a list of useless (maybe) and relevant thoughts circling my mind. Thoughts that are involuntary and short in words. Thoughts I can't or maybe don't want to expand. For this post, which is very much an experiment, I've written out most of my thoughts prior to publishing in a structured form. Yes, anytime something came up, I wrote it out on paper or the memo application on my phone. And yes, this Winter break is already bland and I have nothing better to do but write out my thoughts. All of this thinking makes me think why some of these thoughts come to mind in the first place... why do we think? What triggers some of our thoughts?

1. Lupus. I'm searching for a rheumatologist. I am no longer fit for the pediatric clinic. I've declined surgery for my right knee. Not sure if this will prove to be good...but I'm doing well. I feel quite powerful and independent making this decision. Love saying NO. Overall, I am doing very well. However, next semester will be a tough one because the cold weather is not so much of a friend. If I ask to hold your hand while walking, going up or down a flight of stairs, stepping out of a car, just comply. Don't worry this isn't an excuse to get freaky with you.

2. Why is it that when I put a beautiful picture of myself...the comments or lack of...are so disappointing? Meanwhile, I'm not going to name names, upload pictures of their repulsive selves and manage to get attractive comments...why? Why though?

3. I don't have a boyfriend. Do I need one or do I not need one? My intolerable attitude toward men is still a mystery to me. 

4. My personal radio show -- Brooklyn College, Spring 2012. No fixed title or theme yet. However, you better be ready for me. This is just the beginning. 

5. I don't want to get married. None of the women in my family are happy. Why? But I do want to get married. And I want a grand proposal.

6. My next post is on bullying.

7. Honestly, the friends who are so damn busy all semester, really? Are you really that busy? 

8. My face is fat. It needs to go!
8A. Crotch fat, why?

9. The Aunties advising me stop my no-rice/carb diet, shut up. 
"What?!? You don't eat rice? It's the best thing ever!!!" -- Yeah, this actually happened.

10. For those who think it's a joke when I greet you with "Yo, wuddup?" Stop. Okay, fine, I try to be funny. And I like it when you laugh.

11. Whenever I befriend a new guy...I wonder how long he'll last -- how long we'll remain friends. And I've noticed, they don't last. Only some.

12. Will I be okay? Will my friends be okay?
12A. How's Kumkum? -- (the middle child aka my sister living in France)

13. My parents are hilarious. I'm pretty sure that's where I get my funnies.

14. Requests from unknown people on Facebook. No mutual friends... not sure why you're trying to add me.
"It's hard to make conversation with a stranger."
--"Oh, really? Make it easy."
"I have no interest, sorry."
--"Think that you know me and ask whatever you want...When you came to this world, your mother and father knew you first and then day by day everyone began to know you. Think like that."
"I just have no interest to pursue a friendship with you."
--"Why I bad person!"
So up until the last line, I've rephrased and grammatically corrected what he was trying to say. Yes, this actually happened.

15. My friends are comedians. God bless them all. 


  1. I think it's really incredible that you can turn something simple, like a list into an attention-grabbing post. You're the best writer I've ever had the pleasure of meeting--and though I think I'm a pretty good writer myself, my work pales in comparison to yours.

    I completely feel you on #2. You (this is a general you) see people who are half-naked or someone making a duck face getting 1,000,000 compliments like "omfg why are you so gorgeous?!!" and then you look at your own picture, and even though you thought you looked good and for a second your self-esteem crept out of the toilet, you have a few "pretty!" "nice :)" comments and they might as well flush your self-esteem and the picture.

    And in response to #12: See your #1. You will be okay. You want to know why? Because you're the strongest mothereffing woman I know. So rock on, Shahana.

  2. It's too much of a big compliment when you say that I'm the best writer you've met haha. But I do agree that it is a pleasure to meet me...I feel pleasure looking at myself in the mirror ;)

    Jokes aside, I love compliments from fellow writers and though I've only had the pleasure of reading just one of your pieces, I'd like to read more! Make that happen.

    And finally, thanks for your feedback and encouragement. It really means a lot to me.

  3. There is so much thought and emotion your posts and they're so close to home. Maybe the worries are different, but nevertheless, they are still factors that make it difficult for our minds to stop and be in the moment. Because your post is so true and from the heart, there is something serene about it. You're such a strong girl!

  4. Anna, my love! I am so happy you read it and your continuing support means a lot... I admire your generosity and effort in finding the deeper meaning of this post. Thank you so much. Love you!!!

  5. 1. Stay strong, you seem like you have a very powerful internal strength. it will carry you far in life. But never feel alone, you have a bunch if great friends. And I'll always help if needed.

    2. Because our society favors sex over substance, and unless you are willing to degrade yourself and make stupid duck faces in all of your picture, you won't get the attention of the ignorant people. But you shouldn't concern yourself over there attention because it is worthless, and people of good character will respect you for who you are.

    3. I think he'll find you when the time is right.

    4. I'd like to be a guest *cough* *cough* (^_^)

    5. Don't use others relationships as a marker for what you hope to have. It can be anything you desire it to be.

    6. I'll definitely chime in on that. I have A LOT to say bout that topic.

    7. Maybe...we all go through things I guess.

    8. No comment
    8A. No comment

    9. Do what's good for you.

    10. LOL

    11. Don't think about it so much because you'll attract those negative energies the more you entertain the thought. Instead, take it a day at a time, and be the best YOU that YOU can be.

    12. Yes, everything happens for a reason.
    12A. is she?

    13. It's all in the know genes? Get it? :-D

    14. Decisions, decisions...

    15. And God Bless You!